Is there a way to geht honest feedback on how you behave?

As someone who sweats more than an average person and has a rather limited antiperspirant tolerance. Only roll ons are suitable and even then the smell must be specifically chosen by my wife.

Of course i shower religiously whenever possible and after every activity that makes me sweat. During summer up to twice a day.

Yes, i would be rather greatful if you'd let me know that I'm smelling bad.

Agreed. Try Toastmasters. Also consider dance class

I knew a guy who begged for honest feedback. Like kept complaining about how people would ghost him, and wasn't able to get a date or anything. So when he asked me directly, I pointed it all out.

And here's the thing: he didn't really do much after learning that. He didn't try to change anything for the better. He just took it in, got real defensive for a while then agreed and accepted that "this is who I am".

And maybe that's okay. But he seems dead set on attracting people who hate it.

Learning to read the room is a skill set.

he wanted to hear, his "behaviour" wasnt the problem and its everyone else. dint seem like he was willing to change his behaviour. without prying too much, was it like him using manosphere tactics/pickup artists tips.

alot of the tactis including subtle tactics like browbeating, saying things to gaslight people.

Yeah, that's on him.

There is, however, a big difference between (let's say) "you smell and look at your feet too much" and "you command people around and treat people as inferior", for example

What about an anonymous email?

"Would you like to fill out a customer satisfaction survey to rate this dating experience?"

I try to avoid those relationship guru videos, it feels like a mix of half understood psychology and some one size fits all voodoo. Idk, do you know any good ones that don't fall into that trap?

It's been a while since I was in such an argument that someone questioned my character. Most honest feedback so far was relatives. But I behave very different with someone I have been knowing my whole life and someone I just met. Or worse, feel attracted to. Damn brain chemicals.

I do it all the time, even calling out my female friends on bad behaviour which is a big nono in public settings (I'm a married man, I know, lol), but it requires a soft approach (a "compliment sandwich", for instance) or else everyone starts getting sensitive and feisty, and because of that many people would just rather stay quiet and avoid doing it. In my understanding that nobody wants to be a villain/annoying cunt, I try to tell those I care about so they don't ruin their lives unnecessarily, and I'm not scared of the confrontation that might result from it as I see it as part of the process.

Right now, you're coming across as a very reasonable guy with more than appropriate communication skills... If you're asking for yourself, it would be hard to determine if there's anything weird/off-putting about you just from this post, sadly. In my experience, some of my less savoury traits HAD been called out, numerous times, but without the right attitude, wording or in a setting that would make me dismiss it. It wasn't until later when these traits showed up in shocking, scary ways, that I started putting 2 and 2 together and looking back at what people had told me about myself. Maybe I'll start a call line or discord chat where we can all interact and call each other out when necessary, in brotherly love... sounds like a fun project. 😅